Do you know what happens when you say yes?
You wake up scared the next day. I know this is silly. Everything is great. All will be fine. Except that I have a zit on the side of my nose.
Isn't that the way it goes? There is no good-beyond-belief news without a little freak-out fear mixed in.
What am I afraid of? Oh, I don't know. Maybe the possibility that I will suddenly discover that I have forgotten how to sentence a put together. (See? It's happening!!!)
I also know (because I've been there myself) that there is no hearing about another person's good fortune without a tinge of "But what about me?" This is especially true when you are working as hard and as truly as your heart will stand, and you still haven't gotten to where you want to go. Yet.
So, the Zit on My Nose would like to say to you (and me):
Don't lie to yourself. You do want it. And I promise you that when you do get it, you will want more. When you get that, you will be scared. Deal with it. Deal with it however you need to, but do not wimp out and lie to yourself. About wanting it or being scared. Because the Zit always knows.
It is possible to write with a talking zit on the side of your nose, isn't it?
Isn't it???
Have you tried Windex? Congrats. Truly. I'd like to suggest a celebration in your honor. Perhaps a cyber cocktail party. WE can all meet online at a particular time and offer our congratulations, best wishes, and so happy for yous. Don't forget the windex. You want to look great on such a day.
ReplyDeleteI understand about saying "Yes" as I am constantly choking in the tenth frame. Success can be scary, but you deserve it. Embrace it!
ReplyDeleteThink of what you would want for your own kids. You would want them to realize their own potential and enjoy their success. Follow your heart!
First, and most important, WOO HOO to you.
ReplyDeleteSecond, new things are always a little scary, but it's good when the scary reminds us to sit up and think a little. My fear of power tools is extremely functional in this regard. When I turn on a power tool, I am sure as anything PAYING ATTENTION to what is going on.
I totally get this. Zit, be damned. Sometimes I have to just close my eyes, so to speak, and move forward and I don't freak out so much (on a literal level, I once climbed a 55-foot vertical obstacle course at Maryville College called The Alpine Tower -- well, I've done it several times, but this particular time, I was blindfolded and tethered to Eisha's husband, also my friend. I found that it was easier to climb while blindfolded. My mind didn't trick me out with fear -- none of this "I can't possibly make that hold five feet above me!" I just trusted my gut and felt my way around, listening to encouragement from a friend. Tell your zit to do that!).
ReplyDeleteJules, 7-Imp, whose analogy may possible make NO sense whatsoever
Jules - maybe there is an actual link between vertigo and fear of success...
ReplyDeleteI've tagged you for a fun meme on my blog, if you're interested. :)
ReplyDeleteIt is possible to write with a talking zit on the side of your nose, isn't it?
ReplyDeleteSure it is. Ask Richard E. Grant in How To Get Ahead in Advertising.
Old New Age sounding expression I sometimes think when I don't ant to admit how scared I am: Embrace the fear to erase the fear.
Cornball, that's me.
Donna, but then I'd SMELL like Windex. Wouldn't I?
ReplyDeleteAmy, I love your attitude. And didn't I hear that you kick butt at bowling, too?
Adrienne, whenever I'm afraid, I'm going to think of you with a power tool. In a dress. With your cute purse.
Wow, Jules! That climb! Honestly, it sounds like fun, in a strange, liberating way.
David, I never typed you as a cornball, but I'll try hugging fear, just for you. As long as you swear it won't hug back.
Erin, I'm thinking on your challenge. Fun!
It is fun, Sara. The view is gorgeous when you're done. Here's a pic of it I found online: http://www.maryvillecollege.edu/news/news.asp?id=815&pgID=849. And this -- http://www.dioceseofknoxville.org/etc/june20/STA%20group-tower.jpg. There are seven ways (I think it's seven) to climb it, multiple "faces" to it.
ReplyDeleteYou know, I don't know if that's required for freshman now. When Eisha and I were students, there was a Mountain Challenge course (rock-climbing, boleting (sp?), all kinds of other challenges in the college woods, etc.), and the Tower might be required now. Anyway, when I was a student, I rolled my eyes at how they tried to make us take those challenges and apply them to life (I actually had to write a paper once, entitled "how is tying a knot like life?"), but with that scattered-smothered-and-covered-blindfolded-and-tethered climb, as Brian and I jokingly called it, I really DID learn about how it's easier to climb when not being able to see, not letting your mind trick you out. It actually did teach me a lot about myself, blast it (which brings me back full-circle to your post, which is why I started rambling about this).
Hope things have, y'know, cleared up by now :) Listen, I posted about this post today. Kinda sorta. Hope that's okay...
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