Forward, back, round and round

I believe Kelly Fineman could teach a duck to dance. Yesterday, she lucidly explained how a poet revises. If you don't think that's harder than waltzing with a web-footed wannabe, try it yourself.

Not only that, her post makes you want to drop everything, seize your latest draft and do the poetic two-step that is revision. One word in, two words out. Forward, back, round and round.

That's what I did last night. Danced with my YA poetry manuscript. Thanks, Kelly!

Kelly also invited everyone to revise this prose sentence with her:

Today I walked through the woods as the light faded, heedless of nature until a rustling noise drew my attention to a litter of raccoons near the stream.

Here's my attempt:

Woods, near dark.

Five
mottled shadows

pocketing light
from unsuspecting
stream.

Raccoons?
Or
rustlers?

Now: Read her post and try it yourself. Ducks and everybody.