Tuesday, July 17, 2007

I Lie For a Living

At the International Spy Museum in Washington, D.C., you can buy the following real items. Wouldn't they make perfect gifts for writers?

  • A rubber bracelet that reads: I LIE FOR A LIVING (fiction writers only, please)

  • A T-shirt imprinted with the words: YOU DON'T KNOW ME (perfect for the pre-published writer or the sales-challenged)

  • A coffee mug that says: DENY EVERYTHING (2 for 1, for ghostwriters)

  • A Nancy Drew MadLibs game (to solve cases of writer's block. Bess and George, extra.)

  • A digital spy plane (for research) Replaces earlier model, Pigeon Camera.

  • The book, The Enemy Within (15 % discount if you show your internal critic)

  • Handcuff earrings (only if you're re-writing Pretty Woman)

  • An electronic voice transformer (instantly converts 1st person to 3rd)

  • Crystal lipstick pen (guaranteed to produce a hot pink cover)

  • An invisible journal (to record your first royalty statement)

  • Please note:
  • Tree Stump Listening Device no longer available, due to protests about The Giving Tree
Happy shopping!


  1. HA! I'm torn between amusement at the application of all these items for writers, and a little queasy that "I Lie For A Living" should be for anyone but a writer!!!

  2. Indeed. How dare anyone lie but us???

    The whole spy museum is actually very cool. You can take on a cover identity when you enter, and then try to remember it when an electronic border guard quizzes you. (Kinda like trying to keep up with your characters, huh?) And you can crawl up in some air ducts and "eavesdrop" on conversations. (Again, haven't we writers cornered the market on this?)

  3. Where's that bracelet, I want me that bracelet!

  4. In the gift shop, you can choose a particular bracelet. Online, you can only order them as part of a "party pack" and then you get random ones. :(

    If I get back there, though...

  5. I LIE FOR A LIVING works on so many levels for so many professions: spies, writers, actors...


R-E-S-P-E-C-T (or you will be deleted)

You can receive followup comments to this conversation by checking the "notify me" box below the comment window.